Project Yancey: Episode 2: Doug Can't Dance

For the second episode, we find Doug finishing work on his slug costume for the big dance that coming night.  As he is starting to feel good about it, the door opens and we find Roger come into what seems like Doug's garage asking if his costume is a bag of manure (I wonder why Doug doesn't show any sign of confusion about the biggest bully in school just busting into his house).  Since we know Roger is a total ass, it comes as no surprise that he reminds Doug that he can't dance, and he may very well embarass himself dancing with Patti, and offers to take his place dancing with her.  After Roger leaves, Doug takes a walk to think about his situation and Mr. Dink pulls up next to him to show off his Grade A Thoroughbred Chicken costume [very expensive], he compliments Doug on his excellent sack of dirty socks costume.  Mr. Dink also reveals he is the chaperone at the dance that night, and his cameo is thoroughly useless to the story and probably could have been omitted without any consequence.  So after this Doug tries to think again when he is distracted again, this time by Skeeter, who thinks Doug is wearing a cool Godzilla costume.  Skeeter tries to teach Doug how to dance, but ends up doing some sort of ghetto siezure instead that leaves him all pretzeled up.  With this so-called advice Doug finds himself at the dance and random kids out front think hes wearing a broom costume.  Finally he finds Patti, who actually recognizes he's dressed as a slug, and Roger comes to woo her away from Doug.  Doug shows his first sign of courage in the entire series and tells Roger off as he and Patti go to dance.  The dancing ends up going fine for Doug, and in a last ditch to ruin Doug's night Roger accidently hammers down on Doug's foot with his massively awesome hammer costume, and Doug creates the dance craze we all know as the "slug hop".

Look at all of that 90s glory 

Its terrible that I'm breaking my own rules in the second installment of this series, but I feel this episode warrants an extended series of thoughts and ideas rather than a story from my own life.  Firstly, I would like to point out that I am not a dancer so I don't have much experience in dancing with girls at parties, dances, proms or wherever else you would dance with a girl.  Having said that I must say I do enjoy dancing with girls which brings me to my first point, when you are dancing behind a girl, do they notice your "excitement"?  Do they feel flattered or just creeped out by it?  Do they attempt to get a guesstimate on size which could perhaps effect what happens later?  And lastly, Should I attempt to hide it, thats what I usually do, and I want to know if I'm better off wearing it with pride.  Another interesting point about my history of dancing is that at no point in my college life have I randomly started dancing with a white girl at a party, white girls don't like to dance with me it seems (oh well its all good).  I also will admit I'm not a very big fan of grinding, it's very impersonal and I would prefer to dance face-to-face with a girl that I am actually interested in (but as far as random girls wanting to dance after I've been drinking, its aiight).  So at the end of the day, I know what its like Doug, I don't really know how to dance either, but I will attempt to do the robot if Lady GaGa ever starts playing.