Project Yancey: Episode 13: Doug's Cool Shoes

We find Doug in a tight spot, in his basketball game he's at the free throw line at the end of the game when his team is down one point, but he gets successfully psyched out my Roger and his buddies by pointing out Doug isn't even wearing cool shoes.  As devastating as a blow this is Doug doesn't really start worrying until we hear another plight in the saga of Skunky Beaumont (deserving of it's own series altogether, maybe I'll do it when I'm done Project Yancey), all the girls think Skunky is really cute, but his shoes are a deal breaker, and if he had cool shoes he'd be getting all the girls he wants.  Skeeter also adds insult to injury by showing his shoes off to a girl who totally digs it, this causes Doug to become so dejected he even passes up on the opportunity to shoot some hoops with Patti after school.  Even Mr. Dink got some fancy new exercise shoes, and even though he never says it we should assume they are very expensive.  Once things seem to get their worst, all the commercials Doug sees on TV are about shoes!  But one reaches out to Doug, the Sky Davis Air Jets, the shoes apparently worn by Sky Davis who seems to be a pretty good baller, and he is even gonna be at the Four Leaf Clover mall the next day to autograph Air Jets!  Doug goes to the signing but bypasses the celebrity in the store but instead finds a crazy employee lady who measures his feet and even though Doug measures in at a size 6b, she brings him the last pair or Air Jets that are size 24eee.  While she's out perusing the back room, Doug hallucinates that his old shoes are talking to him, and they are very disappointed in his behavior and even draw tears.  Doug finally finds himself at the checkout counter, but he only has enough for one shoe, so he's sent packing and none other than Roger takes the last pair.  Saddened by his misfortune, Doug sits on the bench and pities himself, that is until none other than Sky Davis takes up a seat next to him (how the hell does Doug keep meeting these celebrities at the most opportune times?)  And get this, Sky Davis compliments his shoes and is even wearing a pair much similar except blue, since Doug and Sky are "sole" brothers, they exchange signatures on each other's shoes and Doug feels good about his shoes again.  The next day at school Roger challenges Doug to a 1-on-1 game, but trips and falls due to his comically large shoes, and Doug takes the ball to the other end for a wide open jumper and wins.  So in the end the plain old sneakers prevail, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Yo dawg, I don't think those fit.

Shoes, shoes, shoes, oh my god shoes, lets get some shoes...  Okay since I've maxed out on my youtube phenomenon quota for the week we shall leave that at that (but I do enjoy it.)  First and foremost, I really hope girls aren't judging me based on my shoes (unless it's socks and sandals or Crocs) it's pretty lame, plus my shoes are cool.  But on a more serious note, I like shoes, I probably think more about my shoes than most guys, but I think that's excusable.  I have 4 pairs of shoes that I typically rotate around, and wear them based on the clothing I'm wearing (yeah I match it up, you got a problem with that) and have even been known to pick my clothes for the day knowing which shoes I want to wear.  But another interesting aspect is that I am a big fan of Adidas cross-training shoes from the 70s, namely Gazelles and Sambas.  I'm in a transition phase with my black pair of shoes (New Balance 374's which I'm also a big fan of), so only 3 of my 4 shoes are Adidas, and two of them are Gazelles.  The taste runs in my family and my oldest brother is the same shoe size as me so I've worn a few pairs of his to a point where it has almost become an obsession.  I have worn 4 pairs of Gazelles in my lifetime (Navy, Tan, Black, Royal Blue, not nearly enough colors), and 2 pairs of Sambas (Black and white), you know what scratch that last comment it has become an obsession.  They are durable, beautiful, comfortable shoes that can be worn in any situation (save for formal settings), and I am quite sure that I will wear Adidas for the rest of my life.  So in the end, I know where Sky Davis is coming from, even though he has his work shoes (basketball shoes for him), but when he just wants to kick it and relax, he always manages to revert back to his old school simple sneakers, and that's my style too.  So yeah I know this one was kinda boring and it definitely wasn't a story, so consider this an entrance to my mind and how I think, because I do think about these things.  (P.S. Fuck Nike)

Jealousy of astronomical levels!  Totally diggin those white and black ones.